If you are a sexually active person in a longer relationship you’ve probably had periods when your partner needs to sleep but you want to have sex or vice versa. This situation can last for a longer period and the good thing is that you can try to change it and match with your partner’s sex drive.
Today’s fast paced lifestyle often makes us feel that we have lack of time and energy for sexual intercourses but in the core of this issue there is something else. In many cases people forget the periods when they didn’t have such high sex drive but when they feel like having sex they get really frustrated if their partner refuses them. In those moments many people start to wonder if the sexual tension and desire is gone and the days when they were having sex almost every day are long gone. This is partially true because over time the passion fades but this certainly doesn’t mean that you should forget about passionate sex.
Luckily there is always a solution for problems like these. In most cases you are currently not matched with your partner’s sex drive. This is not an unusual situation and the fact is that you have probably never matched your partner’s sex drive but the feeling of exploring a new partner and the heated hormones were radiating sexuality all the time. After a while the initial enthusiasm gradually disappears and both partners are back to the level of sexuality when they didn’t know each other. On top of that, sexuality often oscillates because of certain everyday obligations, events and mood. Many experienced sexologists are sure that sexual incompatibility is something completely natural in long-term relationships.
Just like any other solution to psychological problems the problem can be resolved by admitting that you have a problem with matching the sex drive. The best thing to do after acknowledging that problem is to have a honest conversation about it. Lack of proper conversation can lead to misinterpretations and serious problems in the relationship.
First and foremost, try to understand that “sex drive” is a term that can be completely different for you and your partner. Every person is different and there are also huge gender differences. Women usually need a number of factors in place in order to start the sex act, while men can start with the intercourse immediately if they are feeling aroused, regardless of the situation. It is also important to understand that sometimes sex drive can be encouraged. So, try to start foreplay or some other simple things like hugging and kissing that can lead to sex. Stress is one of the main reasons for sexual incompatibility and that’s why you should find a way to relieve that stress. Some physical activities or meditation can be very helpful.
All experts in this field agree that improving the relationship through better conversation, shared activities and bonding can solve this problem in most of these cases.