Tag Archives: sexual desire

sex and relationship, Sex Health

Is sex really that important for a good relationship?

Have you ever wondered how important sex is when it comes to relationships? Can sex directly affect the quality of the relationship? Can it ruin or keep one relationship?

People are always commenting about the reasons why some couple broke up. In some cases you can hear that they broke up because she was really cold or maybe he didn’t satisfy her needs. In these cases many people think that these couples were crazy because they were probably obsessed with sex. Breaking up because of sex looks abnormal at first glance. However, when you continue to hear similar stories you start to ask yourself different questions. For example, is sexual discrepancy or lack of sex a justifiable reason for terminating a long relationship? It looks that this is very realistic and objective reason for that.

Many people are unaware that a lot of couples are ready to stay in bad relationships because of good sex. On the other hand, if the sex is really bad the relationship will usually break after a while although other aspects of that relationship might be good. Sex can be actually viewed as a tool to measure the quality of one relationship. Respect, support when it comes to life goals, sharing same life values are things that all make sense if the sex is right. Sex is a point where all other things connect. In some cases it looks like people either lose the ability or will to talk about their problems when they feel unsatisfied. But how can we talk seriously when there is no relaxed atmosphere and finally how to have sex when there is no meaningful communication? This is a very serious question that bothers a lot of couples who are unfortunately unable to solve it.

So, is it possible to ruin your relationship because of bad sex? In many cases lack of sex is not the only problem in one relationship. Many couples are disappointed with the fact that they don’t have sex in amounts that they consider to be normal. Many relationship break up because partners don’t get what they expected when it comes to sex. Very often these expectations are based on the things we hear and witness from our friends and colleagues. The media and the ads they show, in other words the dreams they are selling are not bad for everything bad that happens in our world. We must understand that modern people are slowly losing their ability to make rational decisions because of the modern lifestyle.

In the past, parents had only few expectations for their children’s partners. Women were satisfied if they were able to find a man that is not violent and likes to work while men were satisfied with women that are good mothers and good housewives. However these expectations are not very good. It is not reasonable to focus on only one or two attributes that a person has. That is not healthy for any relationship, because relationships are much more complicated. You must focus on all aspects of the personality of your partner. Of course, sex is one of the most important aspects of one relationship.

We don’t have the final answer is sex the most important thing in one relationship but lack of sexual desire, cheating, unsatisfied partners are all common reasons for break ups.

premature ejaculation, sex and relationship, Sex Health

Few Ways to Make Sex Last Longer

There are a lot of men who are wondering how they can extend the time of the sexual intercourse. The answer is actually really simple – through practicing some exercises and learning few techniques.

A lot of articles deal with premature ejaculation, but very few focus on extending the normal sexual intercourse. Many men feel uncomfortable because they want their sex to last longer but they can’t find a way to postpone the ejaculation for some period. It is important to be aware that the key factor for making you lasting longer in bed is in your head. The more you are worried the worse results in your bed you will have. Having a partner that constantly makes pressure about the duration of sex can also worsen the situation. If you want to improve and extend your sex, both of you should be patient, careful and optimistic. There are many ways to extend your intercourse and one of the most important thing sis to known your own body and the way it is functioning. Once you master that, your intercourse will be much better. Now let’s see some of the ways that can help you extend your sex.

First of all, try to stimulate your penis to the point where you start to feel that ejaculation is about to happen. In that moment stop the stimulation or even pull out the penis from the vagina and keep it outside until your sexual desire decreases. You can do this several times during one intercourse. After few weeks you will feel the results – you will last longer and you won’t need to practice this technique. Of course, your partner should be aware before you start using this technique because the sudden stop in the intercourse can be unpleasant. Once you explain the benefits she will surely support you.

Another similar method has proven to be effective too. Right before you feel that you are about to ejaculate squeeze your penis. Use the thumb under the glans penis and use the index finger to hold the glans penis. Remember to make a firm grip. The best thing to do is to focus on squeezing the urethra which passes along the penis.

Although condoms are usually used for prevention of unwanted pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases, condoms can also be used to gain endurance during sexual intercourse. Using a thicker condom will additionally decrease the sensitivity of your penis during the intercourse.

Masturbation is another great way to improve sexual endurance and decrease sexual tension. With more frequent masturbation you can develop a routine that can lead to extended sexual intercourse. You can also stop masturbating before ejaculation if you want to get better results.

Just like masturbation, using sex toys can make you feel more resistant to sexual stimulation. There are many different types of sex toys on the market and the most efficient ones are the so-called sexual stimulators. You can also use a sex toy during sex especially in the periods when you feel that you can’t stop ejaculation any longer.

erectile dysfunction, Male Enhancement, sex and relationship, Sex Health

Sexual problems and Depression- some of the most common issues

There are a number of people who are experiencing sexual problems these days. And many get depressed also because of this. Sex is the need of every person on this earth. It is inevitable to get depressed, if this need is not fulfilled due to some clinical reason. Erectile dysfunction (ED) or failure to have an orgasm often causes depression. But there is no need to worry, as doctors have a solution now to deal with sexual problems which lead to depression in persons.

How exactly sexual problems are related to depression?

There is a strong connection between depression and sexual problems. Any human being can get depressed if any desire in his brain in not fulfilled.  Sexual desire is a very strong desire of this sensitive organ. According to a scientific study, Sexual need has its roots in brain as it contains special chemicals called neurotransmitters.  These chemicals are responsible for transmitting the sexual desire from brain cells to sex organs. When our mood is disturbed and we feel down, these chemicals in brain get imbalanced. People who are an easy victim of depression have a very low level of sexual desire as the brain chemicals do not work properly and their brain is always busy in worrying about something.

Are sexual problems caused by antidepressants?

Many depression patients consume antidepressants which can boost up their mood and reduce their depression level. But there are some antidepressants like the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) which have many unwanted side effects related to sexual problems.

Antidepressants actually help brain chemicals in regaining balance so that the person’s mood gets boosted up. The brain chemicals which are altered by Antidepressants are, also responsible for inculcating sexual desire in brain. The level of sexual response gets modified because of Antidepressants, leading to sexual dysfunction. These sexual side effects can increase with increased dosage of antidepressants.

Sexual side effects caused by antidepressants

There are many sexual side effects associated with antidepressants. One is declination in the enjoyment level of sex in persons. A person consuming an antidepressant medication may not enjoy sex or may not be an initiator in a sexual activity. An antidepressant can cause erectile dysfunction (ED) in men. Antidepressants can eventually decrease sexual desire in a person. A person may not be able to achieve an orgasm because of antidepressant consumption.

Treatment for sexual problems caused by depression

Although, a person on antidepressant medication suffers a lot of sexual side effects, but there are many solutions to minimize the sexual side effects of these antidepressant medicines without compromising their natural dosage. You may request your doctor to prescribe you some newer antidepressants that may not hamper the orgasm production and may not cause much sexual side effects.

It is important that your doctor should know that the antidepressant is causing a sexual problem, and then only he can find ways to diminish such side effects. You must communicate clearly with both your partner and doctor regarding sexual side effects.

erectile dysfunction, Male Enhancement, sex and relationship, Sex Health

Sexual Problems And Depression- Some Of The Most Common Issues

There are a number of people who are experiencing sexual problems these days. And many get depressed also because of this. Sex is the need of every person on this earth. It is inevitable to get depressed, if this need is not fulfilled due to some clinical reason. Erectile dysfunction (ED) or failure to have an orgasm often causes depression. But there is no need to worry, as doctors have a solution now to deal with sexual problems which lead to depression in persons.

How exactly sexual problems are related to depression?

There is a strong connection between depression and sexual problems. Any human being can get depressed if any desire in his brain in not fulfilled.  Sexual desire is a very strong desire of this sensitive organ. According to a scientific study, Sexual need has its roots in brain as it contains special chemicals called neurotransmitters.  These chemicals are responsible for transmitting the sexual desire from brain cells to sex organs. When our mood is disturbed and we feel down, these chemicals in brain get imbalanced. People who are an easy victim of depression have a very low level of sexual desire as the brain chemicals do not work properly and their brain is always busy in worrying about something.

Are sexual problems caused by antidepressants?

Many depression patients consume antidepressants which can boost up their mood and reduce their depression level. But there are some antidepressants like the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) which have many unwanted side effects related to sexual problems.

Antidepressants actually help brain chemicals in regaining balance so that the person’s mood gets boosted up. The brain chemicals which are altered by Antidepressants are, also responsible for inculcating sexual desire in brain. The level of sexual response gets modified because of Antidepressants, leading to sexual dysfunction. These sexual side effects can increase with increased dosage of antidepressants.

Sexual side effects caused by antidepressants

There are many sexual side effects associated with antidepressants. One is declination in the enjoyment level of sex in persons. A person consuming an antidepressant medication may not enjoy sex or may not be an initiator in a sexual activity. An antidepressant can cause erectile dysfunction (ED) in men. Antidepressants can eventually decrease sexual desire in a person. A person may not be able to achieve an orgasm because of antidepressant consumption.

Treatment for sexual problems caused by depression

Although, a person on antidepressant medication suffers a lot of sexual side effects, but there are many solutions to minimize the sexual side effects of these antidepressant medicines without compromising their natural dosage. You may request your doctor to prescribe you some newer antidepressants that may not hamper the orgasm production and may not cause much sexual side effects.

It is important that your doctor should know that the antidepressant is causing a sexual problem, and then only he can find ways to diminish such side effects. You must communicate clearly with both your partner and doctor regarding sexual side effects.

erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, sex and relationship, Sex Health

Chronic Illness and Sexuality

Diseases can strongly affect and complicate everyday life and that includes sexuality too. However, sexuality should not be forgotten even when someone is suffering from some chronic illness.

Every chronic illness or pain in general will certainly lower your sexual desire and sexual endurance. If you are recovering from some acute disease you will also notice that your libido is affected. In addition, the medications that you have to take in most cases have negative effect on your sex drive and sexual activity. Furthermore, if you are practicing unhealthy lifestyle you will soon feel the negative effects when it comes to your sexuality. Heavy drinking and smoking for example can lead to erectile problems. Besides physical health, mental health is very important too. Depression for example brings some devastating effects to our self-confidence and ultimately leads to low sexual desire and erectile problems too. Certain health problems cause specific sexual difficulties but the good news is that there is a solution for all those problems.

Diabetes mellitus can cause erectile dysfunction and these difficulties are getting more complicated as the patient grows older. The best advice is to stick to a healthy diet and never miss a meal. This is the best way to postpone possible erectile problems that diabetes brings. Another good advice is to stop worrying too much, because you can develop emotional problems and blockage too. The more you think about your problem the more worried you will get and that doesn’t bring anything good. If you are too worried and you don’t follow the advice from your doctor, you may even completely lose interest in sex.

Erectile problems are very often present before a heart attack and a certain period after a person survives a heart attack. The cause for these erectile problems is the reduced blood flow in the genitalia. The penis needs sufficient blood flow in order to get hard and easily penetrate into the vagina. Those who have survived a heart attack usually face mental problems because of the fear that they can experience another heart attack during the sexual intercourse. This mental pressure is usually present in older men who are trying to have sex with younger women. There is no need to panic because if your doctor has confirmed that you are ready to engage in physical activity again then it is perfectly safe to have sex again. If you are worried that you might get too excited, it’s a good idea to masturbate some time before you have sex. Men who have experienced heart attack should be very careful if they are having sex with a new partner because the whole atmosphere brings a lot more tension.

Those who are suffering from multiple sclerosis should be prepared for erectile problems. They usually have reduced feeling of stimulation and some of them lose the ability of ejaculation. The best thing to do in such case is to stimulate your own erection and continue with the sexual intercourse.

erectile dysfunction, Male Enhancement, sex and relationship, Sex Health

How to Keep your Sperm Healthy?

Determining the sperm quality can be done through three parameters. The first and most important one is the number of sperm in around two cubic centimeters of sperm. There are usually around 35 million sperms in this amount of sperm. If the number is 50% lower, it can cause a lot of problems in male fertility. The second parameter is the mobility of those sperms. Even if someone has 35 million sperms it doesn’t mean that they are healthy. They can be exposed to mechanical damages, abnormal heat or other risk factors that can cause damage. Sperms can be damages while they are in the testicles but they can also be damages while they are on their way from the testicles to the glans penis. If more than half of the sperms are mobile this means that the man is perfectly fertile. This amount of sperms is more than enough for successful conception. The third parameter is used to test and determine the shape of the sperms. Sperms have standard form that allows them to easily fertilize eggs. According to some experts if there are around 15% of sperms with standard shape than the conception should be successful. These numbers are slowly decreasing in the recent years.

There are few ways that can help men keep their sperm healthy. For example, wearing proper underwear is very important. By proper we mean underwear that is not very tight and preferably made of natural materials especially if the weather is hot. Wearing synthetic underwear in hot places can have negative impact on the development of new sperms and the health of the ones that we already have. Try to wear clothes that allow as much air flow as possible. Even in places where it is cold try to wear the minimal amount of clothes. Boxer shorts are probably the best choice for men.

Things such as alcohol, tobacco and drugs have strong influence on the quality of sperm. Besides that they are bad for your overall health and your sex life too (they often cause decrease in sexual desire, erectile dysfunctions etc.). These substances can lower the number of sperms.

Sperm is collected in the testicles and if you don’t have sexual intercourse for a longer period, the sperm is excreted on its own mostly during the night when you are asleep. This is a completely natural way of our body to get rid of the excessive amount of sperm. Of course, it is always better to help our body by having sex or with masturbation because we speed up the process of secretion of “stagnant” seminal fluid. Keep in mind that abnormally frequent masturbation or sex can also affect the development of sperm quality in a negative way. Secretion of sperm once a day is an optimal frequency.

As we have mentioned before a good diet can keep your sperm healthy. A good diet that is consumed regularly will definitely boost your sperm quality.

erectile dysfunction, Male Enhancement, premature ejaculation, sex and relationship, Sex Health

Experts that can help you with your libido

Those who suffer from low libido will be surprised when they learn how many types of experts can help them solve their problem. Difficulties with libido deserve to get the same attention as any other health difficulties that we might have.

General Practitioner (Doctor)

When it comes to problems with libido you must visit your doctor (general practitioner), who can check the regularity of your heart beat and measure your blood pressure in order to determine if there are some signs that you are suffering from health problems. Your doctor should also examine your general physical condition, take note about the different types of medications that you use (if any) and in the end the doctor should discuss about your feelings, relationship with your partner and your general lifestyle. Your mental state is especially important because in many cases depression is the number one factor of low libido. Of course, the physical factors can also cause low sex drive as well as pain during sexual intercourse because they can lead to avoiding these sexual intercourses.

Bioenergetics therapist   

As we’ve concluded before, the problem of libido in men and women can be caused by both mental and physical factors. That’s why a quality bioenergetics therapist can be a good option for those who want to solve this problem. Although many people find this kind of therapy to be a little bit odd, the truth is that these therapies have high level of efficiency. Of course, we are not talking about some uncertified quasi-therapists. You need to find some therapist that has knowledge of alternative medicine and psychotherapy and someone who can apply that knowledge with the help of his experience. A good bioenergetics therapist will tell you if the problem with lack of sex drive is in you or in some external factors. Different therapists use different methods so don’t be surprised if some of them use hands-on, hands-off or some distant methods.

Sexologist

When we talk about sexual difficulties, sexologists act like investigators. There can be many reasons behind the lack of sexual desire like problems with erection, difficulties with reaching orgasm, problems with early ejaculation, problems with late ejaculation, problems with delayed ejaculation and many more. The role of the sexologist is to precisely determine where the problem is. However, many people avoid going to a sexologist and they have different reasons for this avoidance. Some of them find going to a sexologist uncomfortable while some of them don’t take their sexual problems seriously and they hope that the problems will go away by themselves.

Sex Therapist

When the sexologist or the general practitioner determines that the problems with your libido have their root in the mental sphere they can recommend visiting a specialized sex therapist. These therapists focus on discussing the problem with you and your partner. In some cases, individuals have problems in communication with their partner or maybe they have problems with maintaining long relationships and  the therapists is here to find the cause of the problem and solve it.

Male Enhancement, sex and relationship, Sex Health, Sex Life Story

How to deal with frigidity?

If you don’t have any sexual desire, you can’t get aroused and you can’t even dream of having an orgasm, you are probably suffering from frigidity.

But it’s important to determine if you are surely frigid. The term frigidity doesn’t apply in situations when the woman doesn’t enjoy the sexual intercourse when she is tired, sick, in periods when she has too much work, when she is with a partner that doesn’t excite her or in periods when she doesn’t have any private space. Many men don’t understand women and their sexuality. They think that women are always ready for sex and with little effort they can engage sexual activity. Some of them even think that the process can start as soon as the penis enters the vagina. That has nothing to do with frigidity; this only means that these men don’t understand female body and their partner. You are not suffering from frigidity if you are not ready to have sex every time your partner asks. If frigidity was all those things we have mentioned before, every woman in the world would be considered to be frigid. Frigidity is something very different and far more serious. To be more precise, a frigid woman is the one who loves her partner and is not afraid to try anything in sex but can’t really enjoy in it even though she tries hard to achieve pleasure with her partner.

Although some people compare frigidity with impotence, but the fact is that these two things are completely different. The most common cause for this condition is stress or even something more banal. It is important to understand that frigidity is an individual problem for every woman and that’s why you can hardly find a universal solution in some book or from an advice from a friend. Some rare cases of frigidity are very simple. Sometimes the reasons are some medications like birth control pills that cause low sex drive. Motherhood and pregnancy can be another reason for this. If the pain during the sexual intercourse is one of the reasons, you can find the solution to your problem by visiting a gynecologist. These problems are easily solvable and they are completely logical. If all these examples are not part of your problem and you have already talked honestly with your partner about your problem but the situation remains the same maybe it’s time to visit a therapist with whom you can share the problem. Sometimes a combination of physical and mental reasons might be the root of this problem. Find a successful therapist and start with the therapy. Remember that this process is often long.

However, there is one method that can be used before you visit a specialist and that’s exploring your own body. Masturbation that leads to orgasm in women is a lot longer and more complex process compared to men’s masturbation. Take your time, relax and explore your body. If this doesn’t help than it’s probably the best time to visit the therapist.

sex and relationship, Sex Health

Nocturnal Ejaculation

Orgasm during sleep is often linked with teenagers but the truth is that this happens in older men too. There are few reasons for this interesting phenomenon.

When a child becomes a sexually mature person, he often begins to dream about so-called sexual fantasies/dreams. These fantasies are also called wet dreams and they are usually caused by daily experiences. The reasons can be various – a short erotic scene from a movie, a beautiful classmate, some attractive celebrity and even erotic literature. These things usually happen to teenagers that haven’t experienced sexual intercourse yet or teenagers who haven’t masturbated yet. This is a completely natural teenage phenomenon that can occur in some teenagers and it is not a reason for being worried. Nocturnal ejaculations usually start around the age of 14. In rare cases, children that are twelve or thirteen years old can experience these nocturnal ejaculations too. Of course many male teenagers never experience this phenomenon. It’s good to know that this is happening randomly and there are no rules about it. Parents should remember that there is nothing wrong about nocturnal ejaculation.

So, how exactly these wet dreams that cause nocturnal ejaculation look like? These are dreams in which men dream about certain sights, events and happenings that they link with their sexual desires. While they are awake all these desires are pushed into the subconscious. Some experts say that men push these desires because they are afraid or ashamed of them and that’s the reason why they are so realistic in the dreams. It looks like a good psychiatrist like Freud could explain all these things. This legendary scientist linked all dreams with sexuality, especially when it came to the so-called hidden sexual dreams that contain various sexual symbols. According to him, female genitals often occur in the shape of vase, box, room or gardens while male genitals in the form of dagger, snake, stick while the sexual act can appear as a ride with a car or something similar. All these hidden sexual symbols can tell a lot about the person that is dreaming but that’s another topic.

What is interesting about nocturnal ejaculation is that this phenomenon can happen in older men too. It is usually happening in men that irregularly satisfy their sexual needs or this may be a reflection of their inability to satisfy some strong sexual desire because they are afraid or unable to do it. In many cases we are talking about certain sexual deviation that is not acceptable for the society but the individual still fantasizes about it. These dreams that cause nocturnal ejaculation can be about sexual deviance, perversion and about satisfying sexual desire in an strange, unusual and unacceptable way. Of course these are only some of the cases. The reason might be a simple erotic fantasy that can cause arousal even when we are awake.

Nocturnal ejaculation can be described as a subconscious sexual self-satisfaction that doesn’t affect the male sexual power in the waking state.

Male Enhancement, premature ejaculation, sex and relationship, Sex Health

How to deal with low sex drive?

Decrease in sexual desire and sex drive in people who are in a serious relationship can lead to various problems. The causes of reduced sex drive can be a disease, but very often they are a result of seemingly small business, family or psychological problems. The good news is that these problems can be solved relatively easily.

People have been working to increase male libido from the ancient times. Different nations had different methods to achieve greater sex drive. For example, ancient Greeks believed that bull testicles can increase their potency while ancient Romans used various means against impotence including sea food like oysters. Other people used means that were considered to be magical, and although these means might not physically improve their performance it was enough to make a psychological boost and increase sexual desire. Some of these aphrodisiacs included the horns of certain animals, various spells, pickled bugs etc. Since ancient times, people have experimented with different types of food that were considered to be helpful for the libido. Food like truffles, cinnamon, celery, kefir, giner, herbalk teas and other were used regularly. American Indians for example used the plant called Tumer which is now part of many medications that are used to increase potency.

Lack of sexual desire is present in both sexes equally and it surely affects the stability of the relationship in a very negative way. Sexual weakness in men is manifested with diminished erection, delayed or premature erection and overall lack of sexual desire. Women tend to have different type of problems like vaginal dryness, having trouble to achieve sexual arousal and or difficulties with reaching and experiencing orgasm.

So what exactly causes these problems? Causes of problems related to love life can be a variety of diseases like high blood cholesterol, high blood pressure, hormonal disorder, impaired circulation, side effects of certain medications, diabetes and other medical conditions. Furthermore, vices like tobacco, alcohol or drugs can have very negative impact on sexual desire and the sexual power of both women and men. There are few other causes that can produce serious problems with the libido like depression, stress, irregular sleep and insomnia, unhealthy diet, chronic fatigue, improper communication, lack of time, modern lifestyle, busy schedule at the workplace, some serious family problems and similar issues.

Fortunately, if not all, most of these problems that cause lack of sex drive can be reduced and even completely solved. Of course in order to get rid of these problems they should be taken seriously by both partners and they need to have intention to solve those problems. For example, diseases that can cause lack of sex drive can be treated with proper therapies. Problems linked with everyday activities can be solved by better organization of your life and obligations. Trust, love and regular communication will certainly help you deal with sex drive problems.

If your sex drive is reduced because of some serious medical issue or some other very serious problem you should consult an expert. There are a lot of counseling services that will give you directions how to overcome your problems and help you with your sex life.