Talking about sex with a teenager has never been and will probably never be easy. However, the good thing is that the times are changed and this topic is slowly becoming something that is not so unpleasant to talk about and it is no longer considered to be a taboo in the modern family.
Probably the biggest reason or this is the advance of media (especially the internet). Young people today have almost limitless access to various information regarding sexual life and sexual health. However, if you are a parent you can’t skip talking about this topic with your teenage children just because they can learn about it on the internet. It is very important that you point out to your children that you are the first person that they should talk with if they have any questions, dilemmas and problems related to sex. Regardless of the strength of the relationship between you and your children and the trust you have in each other, sex is a topic that is very serious and intimate so you should be very careful about how you start this conversation.
Before making this conversation you should be prepared about the possible questions that your child may ask. Take your time and don’t make this conversation in a hurry. It’s probably the best to ask your teen what he or she already knows about sex. This will lead to a more pleasant atmosphere and you might be surprised how many or maybe little things about sex your kid knows. Use straight language when you talk about sexual organs and other terms related to sex to avoid confusion and make the conversation more serious. Besides the physical aspect you must also talk about the emotional side of sex. This is the biggest problems in today’s teenagers because even though some of them understand almost everything about the physical aspect of sex they don’t understand that sex is much more than that. It is important to point out that you support them and you know how mature they are and that your advice to them is to wait until they turn 18. Starting sexual life just because your friends are starting too is wrong and this is what they need to know.
Although this conversation should not be intimidating you must mention topics such as sexually transmitted diseases (std) and pregnancy because these two things are very often linked with sex. Explain the importance of being a parent and the responsibility that parenting brings. You should also explain how unprotected sex can cause various sexually transmitted diseases and how using protection (condoms) can help. Throughout the conversation encourage your kid to ask questions and make sure he understands what you are talking about. In order to bond closer, you can tell him about your first sexual experience.
Finally, this conversation with your teenage daughter or son should be friendly and a talk between equal individuals and it should certainly not look like a lecture!