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Sexual dysfunction – Facts and Symptoms

It is difficult to establish the prevalence of sexual problems in the population because of the difficulties involved in carrying out surveys of people’s sexual behaviour. The commonest kinds of problems presenting to a sexual dysfunction clinic are,

Women

Low sexual desire 50%

Orgasmic dysfunction 20%

Vaginismus 20%

Dyspareunia 5%

Men

Erectile dysfunction 60%

Premature ejaculation 15%

Delayed ejaculation 5%

Low sexual desire 5%

The assessment of sexual dysfunction

Patients with sexual problems initially often complain about other symptoms because they feel too embarrassed to reveal a sexual problem directly. For example, a patient may ask for help with anxiety, depression, poor sleep, or gynaecological symptoms. It is therefore important to ask routinely a few questions about sexual functioning when assessing patients with non-specific psychological or physical symptoms.

In a full assessment, the interviewer should begin by explaining why it will be necessary to ask about intimate details of the patient’s sexual life, and should then ask questions in a sympathetic, matter-of-fact way.

Whenever possible both sexual partners should be interviewed, at first separately and then together.

The assessment should cover the following issues.

  • Has the problem been present from the first intercourse, or did it start after a period of normal sexual functioning? Each partner should be asked, separately, whether the same problem has occurred with another partner, or during masturbation.
  • The strength of sexual drive should be assessed in terms of the frequency of sexual arousal, intercourse, and masturbation. Motivation for treatment of sexual dysfunction should be assessed, starting with questions about who took the initiative in seeking treatment and for what reason.
  • Assess each partner’s social relationships with the other sex, with particular reference to shyness and social inhibition.
  • Enquiries should be made about the partners’ feelings for one another: partners who lack a mutual caring relationship are unlikely to achieve a fully satisfactory sexual relationship. Many couples say that their relationship problems result from their sexual problems, when the causal connection is really the reverse. Tactful questions should be asked about commitment to the partner and, when appropriate, about infidelity and fears of sexually transmitted disease, including HIV.
  • Assess sexual development and sexual experience, paying particular attention to experiences such as child abuse, incest, or sexual assault that may have caused lasting anxiety or disgust about sex.
  • Enquiry should be made about homosexual as well as heterosexual feelings.
  • In the medical history, the most relevant things to look for are previous and present psychiatric and chronic physical disorders and their treatment, pregnancy, childbirth, and abortion(s), and use of alcohol or drugs, such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs).
  • In the mental state examination look especially for evidence of depressive disorder. Physical examination is important because physical illness often causes sexual problems Physical examination of women may require specialist gynaecological help. Further investigations may be necessary depending on the findings from the history and examination (e.g. if diabetes is suspected as a cause of sexual disorder).

Ejaculation problems

Orgasm in men is accompanied by secretion of semen. Many men simply cannot imagine how it looks like if they can’t experience ejaculation. Almost every culture in the world has attributed special meaning and symbolism for this bodily fluid and consequently the loss of ability to ejaculate semen was considered to be a clear sign of weakness. In addition, there are many men who are facing the problem of so-called premature ejaculation. There are several types of ejaculation problems and ach of them should be observed separately and carefully. The most common problems with ejaculation include:  anejaculation, retrograde ejaculation and premature ejaculation.

Anejaculation

Anejaculation is a term used to describe a situation where the men cannot secrete sperm. It can be caused my physical and emotional difficulties and disabilities. In most cases, anejaculation doesn’t mean absence of orgasm. Psychological anejaculation may be occasional or permanent and complete. Ocassioanlly means that the man can ejaculate in some situations while in others he is completely unable to do that. In most cases this doesn’t depend only on the situation, but it also depends on the person with whom the man is building a sexual relationship. Situaitonal psychological anejaculation can be seen during masturbation – many men ejaculate during masturbation, but they can’t when they are having actual sexual intercourse. Stress can significantly affect orgasm,  the occasional anejaculation. On the other hand, physical anejaculation may appear due to certain neurological damages. One important factor is the appearance of diabetes.

Retrograde ejaculation

Most men become aware of their problem only after their notice that their orgasm is not accompanied by secretion of fluid. Retrograde ejaculation means absence of sperm and not absence of orgasm. Male orgasm can still be felt with the same level of intensity as before. There are many different reasons that lead to this situation. For example, retrograde ejaculation can be caused by medications or certain surgeries in the abdominal area (especially close to the area where the reproductive organs are located). Retrograde ejaculation can come as a result of certain diseases like diabetes for example. There are also people who are trying to learn how to achieve retrograde ejaculation. This is a technique used by some men who want to prevent pregnancy, while others use it in order to prolong the duration of the sexual intercourse. However, it is good to mention that by using this technique intentionally you risk to damage the nerves in the area between the testicles and anus which are essential for sexual satisfaction.

Premature ejaculation

About 30% of men (between 18 and 60 years) are suffering from premature ejaculation. This occurrence is not measured only with the time of ejaculation, but it also includes some other factors like reduced control over the ejaculation, decreased satisfaction during the sexual intercourse etc. in the explanation of the causes of this problem, the first sexual experience very often play the biggest role. The basic advice from the experts for men suffering from premature ejaculation is to talk with their partner. If the problem doesn’t go away for two or more years then it is good to visit a doctor and ask for help.

Sex sighs as a sign of a sexual pleasure

Sex sighs are sounds made by both men and women during the sexual intercourse but they are more often present in women. Many men believe that the volume if this sighs actually shows the strength of orgasm and arousal in women which is wrong.

In case you didn’t know, female orgasms are a little bit more complicated than male orgasms and it is practically invisible. This can lead to wrong impression when we are trying to decipher the body signals in a woman’s body. For example, it is almost impossible for men to be sure if their female partner is faking orgasms or not. This is only possible in cases when men know their partner’s body very well and in details. Another thing that is really hard for men to interpret is the intensity of the orgasm that their partner has experienced. If your partner is barely audible during orgasm and during some other sexual intercourse she is loud and “emits” sex sighs this doesn’t mean that she had a intense orgasm only in the second case. For example, in many cases the strongest orgasms are so intense that women simply cannot make any sounds or even produce a sigh. They start breathing only when the vaginal spasms loosen.

Some men determine whether they are good lovers or not depending on the sex sighs their partners produce. The louder their partner is the more self-confident they feel. This is what provides consciousness in porn actors because their partner with a loud moaning “describes” a good sexual experience and the audience is assured that she is very excited. Of course, there are men that find sex sighs and loud moaning very stimulating and they enjoy sex even more. According to many studies there are women who get aroused and very excited when they are listening to their own moaning for better sexual pleasure.

Furthermore, there is no doubt that there are many couples today who want to spice up their sexual life by using various erotic toys and accessories. The experience of using these toys and accessories is probably less enjoyable for those men who are usually surprised by the loud sighs and screams their partners have when they are using some of these toys. Once again, you should know that there is no room for any worries. The volume doesn’t mean anything, so forget about all the theories that sex toys can be a danger for you and that you can be replaced by some toy. This high volume is usually a result of the fact that the woman knows that someone is watching her. In these moments women easily live up in the role of real naughty individuals which is certainly not an indicator of the intensity of an experienced orgasm.

A woman that has lived all her life with silent orgasms (either with the help of a partner or through masturbation) will probably find difficult to get rid of this habit. In case you wish your partner is a little bit louder you can do few things that can encourage her to be louder – talk to her, change the room, change the ambience etc. You will need to put some effort for better sexual health.

Best Ways to Maintain a Hard Erection

Everyman that is of age and has engaged themselves in a sexual activity knows how their ego can get tarnished after under performing in the bedroom. It gets even worse if they suffer from premature ejaculation.

That said however, there is no need to get alarmed by premature ejaculation as a whopping 66% of men on planet earth suffer from this dilemma. The great news however is, one is capable of following natural sex tips to get rid of premature ejaculation as well as erectile dysfunction if they suffer from it.

Better still, mentioned below are surefire ways that will help you last longer in the bedroom, take them to be the soft erection treatment that you have been after this whole time…

Mastering Masturbation

Well, we all masturbate at one point or another, as you engage in this act, fill your mind with your lady’s orgasm and never your own. Simply, take your time and spend in the least fifteen minutes doing the act till that time you reach the point of no return.

Restrain yourself from reaching an orgasm until when the fifteen minutes are over.

Squeeze

If you know too well that overheating makes you have premature ejaculation, stop pumping, get outside of her and squeeze right below your penis head. Make sure that you squeeze the urethra. This simple action pushes blood away from your penis thus curbing your ejaculation.

Point Ejaculatory predictability

As any scientist will have you know, sexual response comes in four phases including: The Excitement Stage, The Plateau Stage, The Orgasm Stage and finally The Resolution Stage. The thing you ought to do is fully master and recognize your feelings spectrum all through the process of ejaculation.

Take action first and foremost by rating your excitement on a scale of 1 to 10. Also, you need to make sure that the highest rate you go is seven if you fully wish to satisfy your woman.

Sex-Exercise

Kegel exercises are some of the best form of exercises that help in the tightening and strengthening muscles that are responsible for your ejaculatory control. Kegel exercises helps to prevent erectile dysfunction as well. Start doing these exercises simply by cutting urine flow, followed by starting and stopping it repeated times.

Once you master kegel exercises, you now halve the chance to practice them anywhere at home, at your office desk, as you drive to and from work. All you simply have to do is tighten these muscles and count to ten and release and repeat them. This will improve your sexual health.

Stop premature Ejaculation

We all want to maintain hard erections but unfortunately, premature erection is something that almost every man of age is susceptible to at a point in their life. If you sadly are unfortunate enough to suffer from premature ejaculation or erectile dysfunction (ED), its time you too up action and get rid of this nuisance once and for all.

Stopping Ed to maintain hard erection requires that you embrace simple. There are quite effective techniques that will bring longevity to your ejaculation and at the end. You will be able to achieve what many more men only dream of “Unlimited Sexual Prowess…! Let us take a look at what you ought to do…

Self-Gratification Path to Sexual Endurance

The self-gratification method to achieving sexual longevity is simply mastering the art of masturbation. Yes, masturbation when done in the right way is a wonderful experience. Masturbation allows one to avert any premature ejaculation as they engage in sexual activity. If you masturbate often, your penis will feel less sensitive and this helps to last longer in bed.

Don’t be surprised, as we are all too familiar with this act, many of us feel the need of masturbating is a ploy of deriving pleasure. This is not the entire truth however. Masturbation when done correctly is an act that will set you on the right path to achieving an orgasm.

This is the best natural soft erection treatment. All you need to do is remain very relaxed and build up the pleasure as you would usually do in your other masturbating endeavours. Only that this time round you are keen not to reach the point of no return.

The instant you feel that you are about to hit your pleasure (Sexual) pinnacles, you should at once cease the stimulation. The key is to NEVER target your orgasm. You should instead be focused on enjoying the masturbation act as long as you possibly can.

It is not impossible, slowly but steadily, you will get to a point where you feel the arousal climbing and be strong enough to lower the stimulation. You will arrive at a point where your body will remain relaxed completely allowing you to get started all over again.

Piece of Advice

Many medics and many men that stop premature ejaculation insist that it’s best to practice pelvic muscle exercises throughout the day. Just within a short period of time, the arousal gets better. The beautiful thing is, you can hold the pelvic muscle for 30 seconds and release it ten times every set without anyone noticing or interfering with your work!

Should You Have Sex Every Night: 14 Reasons People Tend To Forgo The Sex Act

There are some women, and many men, who are under the impression that the one key way to keep relationships thriving and happy is to have sex every night of the week. Here’s reality: no one has time to have sex every day. There is so much going on in life that having sex every night is next to impossible.

14 Key Reasons People Choose Not To Have Sex Every Evening

1 – Television Shows

Let’s be honest… the TV has a lot of good shows to watch – from comedy, to drama, to horror to reality – every now and again, you just want to watch a little good TV instead of a good romp in bed.

2 – Reading Books

If you’re not into The Walking Dead, Grey’s Anatomy or Dancing with the Stars, you may be into reading the next Stephen King book or re-reading a Harry Potter novel.  Sometimes, when you get to reading, it can be hard to put the book down… even to go to bed! Sex, every now and again, takes a backseat to a good book.

3 – Tiredness

Sometimes sex is the last thing on your mind when you’re tired. Perhaps the day was just too busy. You had to worry about a big project at work, the kids were misbehaving, you had to get them ready for school, had to cook supper, etc. Sex isn’t always the top priority on days like this. Sleep is always a good thing because it allows your body to recharge.

4 – Sex Was Excessively Rough The Night Before

Sex can get rough from time to time, and the next night should be a day off to recover. This is especially true if you got in a “good” sexual workout. Do your legs or arm hurt? Then, the best thing you can do is take the evening off to just relax and forget the sex.

5 – You Had Food That Disagrees With Your Stomach

It’s not uncommon to have an upset stomach. And, some types of foods – Chinese, Mexican, Indian, hard boiled eggs, etc. – can cause your stomach to be even more upset. If you’re lactose intolerant – but not enough to be a severe allergy to it – ice cream could make your stomach upset. You certainly don’t want to try having sex on a rough stomach. You definitely don’t want to be farting or belching in the middle of the sex act.

6 – You’re Suffering A Migraine or Nasty Regular Headache

If you’re stressed out from life, then you’re probably going to be suffering with a headache. Now, even though sex can help release endorphins that will help relieve headaches for a short time, it can be hard to get the motivation to actually start the sex act. Therefore, it’s just best to take the night off.

7 – You Could Have A UTI

It’s not uncommon for women to get UTIs. And, you certainly don’t want to worsen the condition or make your partner suffer. Take some time off from sex until you know for sure you’re passed the UTI.

8 – Masturbation

When you or your partner masturbates, it can take some time to recover from the act. Therefore, sex may need to take a back burner for the night.

9 – Your Bedtimes May Differ

Now, some men and women have differing bedtimes. If your other half comes home after you go to bed, the chances of having sex are slim to none. Of course, there’s always that possibility of a late-night grope, but even if that’s not the case, tomorrow is just another day to try the sex act again.

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10 – You Are Angry At Him

Did you and your other half have a fight? If you’re still angry, the last thing you want to do is have sex with him. While you shouldn’t go to bed angry, you certainly don’t have to have sex to makeup with him. Of course, makeup sex can lead to some good sexual bedroom escapades.

11 – You Both Don’t Feel Like Going Through The Act

It’s okay! Life does go on. Spend the time relaxing and enjoy the sex at a later date.

12 – Cuddling Is Far More Important

Perhaps all you want is a little cuddle time, and that’s perfectly fine! Just being held by your significant other can be just as fun and relaxing as sex itself.

13 – Someone Is Spending The Night

If you have someone over for the night, you may be wondering if they could hear you having sex. Does it make you feel uncomfortable having sex with someone in your house? Do you think you’d disturb them by having sex? For the sake of that person, it’s okay to opt out of the sex act and just go to bed!

14 – Work Demands Your Undivided Attention

Sometimes big projects at work demand your total attention, and if the total attention goes into the overnight hours, then you definitely are not going to be thinking about sex.  Finish the project then later have great sex to make up for it.

Is Sex Without Penetration Possible?

When someone mentions sex we usually think about penetration. However, it is good to know that sex is not limited only to penetration and the only questions is – can you imagine sex without penetration?

Most people understand sex as a contact between male and female genitalia. In other words they equate sex to traditional vaginal sex. This is supposed to be real sex when we talk about the diversity of sex because people always try to find out new sex positions. The rest is considered to be only comfortable additions like solo or mutual masturbation, oral and anal sex and even cyber and phone sex. Even the term foreplay used to describe the period before vaginal sex is “telling” us that the main act is the vaginal sex – that this is the real thing. This human fixation and preoccupation with certain sexual behavior can cause frustrations in many people, because there are periods in every individual’s life when they have decreased interest in that kind of sexual activity. Take long relationships as an example. Sex can become boring and perhaps one of the partners is suffering from depression or some other emotional difficulty or maybe he or she has pains during the sexual intercourse. These situations are especially common in women during pregnancy or after gynecologist surgeries. So, is it possible to have sex during this period? Experts believe that it is possible to have other forms of sex.

For example, touching can arouse anyone, but we see this act as a part of foreplay. But remember the old days when you were a teenager and how you felt when the person you liked touched you. You instantly felt aroused all over your body. Those were the first steps of exploring your body and your partner’s body from its sexual side. This is a sexual technique that can be used in any age. Focus on touching. Kiss, fondle and explore every part of your bodies. Many people use essential oils and body lotions for massage in order to increase the sensation. You will soon find out that the fingers can lead you to equally strong orgasms.

Many people forget how sexy words can be. There are a lot of people that are aroused when their partner or they whisper in the ear of their partner while some people like to yell and talk dirty things so they can enhance the feeling.  Words are actually really strong tool when it comes to sex. If you are unable to have sex (due to injury or maybe because you are separated) words can easily make you reach orgasm.

Verbal communication is only one type of communication. People can communicate even without talking or touching. People usually feel when their partner is angry, happy, anxious or relaxed just by sitting next to him or her. It takes just a simple look in their eyes to find out how they feel. Sometimes, staring at each other can cause rush of hormones that can lead to strong orgasm. Mix this staring with touching and talking and you will be able to reach powerful orgasm without penetration.

Understanding Female Orgasm Difficulties

Many women cannot reach orgasm because of the simple fact that they don’t know what causes excitement in them. Despite the fact that modern women are fully sexually emancipated, many women still have trouble reaching proper orgasm. This condition is often medically described as anorgasmia and the reasons that lead to this state are virtually endless. The two main types of anorgasmic causes are physical and psychological causes. In this article we will try to talk about a cause that can be listed in both categories. With all those psychological and health causes there is a possibility that women cannot reach orgasm because they simply don’t know what turns them on. The reason behind this is their prejudices regarding sex or maybe they have not explored their body in a proper way yet.

A woman can become a good doctor for her own body if she finds the necessary time and courage to explore her own body and the reaction of the body to different types of stimulations. Of course, you can always consult your doctor but if you are already looking for help from qualified individuals then it is better to consult a sex therapist or a sexologist. These experts can lead individuals step by step until they reach their final goal. Of course, this means that women might have to answer some straightforward and unpleasant questions that need completely honest answers but this is the only for the expert to explore his patient’s sexuality. Sex therapist very often stand up for masturbation because one of the biggest advantages of masturbation is that the person practicing it will explore her body. Another specialist that can help you with this process is a bioenergetic therapist.

In order for one individual to get familiar with all the properties of sexuality he or she must explore the body in details, especially how the body reacts onerotic stimulations. Women can determine this by testing if they test which type of stimulation suits them the best – clitoral, vaginal stimulation or maybe direct penetration in the vagina. Some women need two types of stimulation in order to achieve orgasm. Some women need long foreplay while others find long foreplay boring and useless. Sex therapist suggest that women should explore their vaginas in details without any embarrassment. They can even masturbate in front of a mirror in order to see how the vagina reacts on different stimulations. A lot of celebrities are encouraging women to explore their bodies and love their reproductive system.

Finally, every woman should talk with her partner about the things that she finds stimulating. She should also talk about the things that make her reach an orgasm fast. In this way you can make the shyness, fears and all the unpleasant feelings that burden your sexuality go away. In these cases it is good to have a partner that knows when he needs to listen and a partner who is ready to explore your sexuality with your help.

How to deal with frigidity?

If you don’t have any sexual desire, you can’t get aroused and you can’t even dream of having an orgasm, you are probably suffering from frigidity.

But it’s important to determine if you are surely frigid. The term frigidity doesn’t apply in situations when the woman doesn’t enjoy the sexual intercourse when she is tired, sick, in periods when she has too much work, when she is with a partner that doesn’t excite her or in periods when she doesn’t have any private space. Many men don’t understand women and their sexuality. They think that women are always ready for sex and with little effort they can engage sexual activity. Some of them even think that the process can start as soon as the penis enters the vagina. That has nothing to do with frigidity; this only means that these men don’t understand female body and their partner. You are not suffering from frigidity if you are not ready to have sex every time your partner asks. If frigidity was all those things we have mentioned before, every woman in the world would be considered to be frigid. Frigidity is something very different and far more serious. To be more precise, a frigid woman is the one who loves her partner and is not afraid to try anything in sex but can’t really enjoy in it even though she tries hard to achieve pleasure with her partner.

Although some people compare frigidity with impotence, but the fact is that these two things are completely different. The most common cause for this condition is stress or even something more banal. It is important to understand that frigidity is an individual problem for every woman and that’s why you can hardly find a universal solution in some book or from an advice from a friend. Some rare cases of frigidity are very simple. Sometimes the reasons are some medications like birth control pills that cause low sex drive. Motherhood and pregnancy can be another reason for this. If the pain during the sexual intercourse is one of the reasons, you can find the solution to your problem by visiting a gynecologist. These problems are easily solvable and they are completely logical. If all these examples are not part of your problem and you have already talked honestly with your partner about your problem but the situation remains the same maybe it’s time to visit a therapist with whom you can share the problem. Sometimes a combination of physical and mental reasons might be the root of this problem. Find a successful therapist and start with the therapy. Remember that this process is often long.

However, there is one method that can be used before you visit a specialist and that’s exploring your own body. Masturbation that leads to orgasm in women is a lot longer and more complex process compared to men’s masturbation. Take your time, relax and explore your body. If this doesn’t help than it’s probably the best time to visit the therapist.

Frequency of sexual intercourses

There a lot of people who ask themselves if they are having too much sex or maybe they are having less sexual intercourses then the others. The frequency of sexual intercourses is always good if both partners are satisfied with it. This means that the frequency of sexual intercourse is not something that we should compare with other couples of individuals. Furthermore, you can’t find any strict guidance about how much sex is enough and that is exactly the beauty of sex – we are not following any rules and we should not feel it as some kind of everyday obligation.

However there are some numbers that are considered to be “normal”. The common frequency of sexual intercourse is around two to three times a week. However there are many people who practice sex even more. Some people are guided strictly by their own schedules while others enjoy spontaneous sex. If you are having sex less than two times a week this doesn’t mean that you are doing something wrong. If your partner is happy and you are happy and the whole sexual act is passionate then you don’t need to be worried about anything.  On the other hand if you feel bad about the infrequent sexual intercourses you should talk honestly about that with your partner.

People who practice only vaginal sex should know that they should be prepared to fewer orgasms compared to those who are ready to do some experiments like oral sex, masturbation or different types of sex games, because all these experiments can cause a lot more orgasms. This also means that the second group of people is most likely to have sex more frequently because of the bigger excitement.

You should always be open minded and seek your own sexual combination which depends on your reactions: if only one of you needs more sex, his or her needs can be satisfied with additional techniques and align those needs with your own.

Of course you should be aware that over the years the frequency decreases but there is no age in which you wouldn’t want to surprise yourself in some occasions. That’s why you should not feel miserable because of the frequency of your sexual intercourses and don’t worry if your friends tell you that they are having much more sex than you.

Remember that sex is not a game in which you have to collect points every time you have sex. You must be aware that there can be some periods in your life and in the life of your partner where you won’t feel the need of sex that much. There can be different causes for this situation but that doesn’t mean that you should put pressure on each other. Sexual drive is not something constant and that desire starts to fade with the years.

After all, the frequency of sexual intercourses is usually determined by the level of some chemical processes that take part in our bodies. That’s why, as the years go by, you should pay more attention on building a solid emotional connection with your partner in order to ignite sexual desire between the two of you.